Re: need help finding a part


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Posted by Arthur (in NY) on Friday, August 05, 2005 at 10:27AM :

In Reply to: need help finding a part posted by Joe on Thursday, August 04, 2005 at 11:41PM :

We all have at one time needed to find a part. Here are the generally-accepted truck-restoration industry rules:

Crawl under truck. Draw an "X" connecting all four wheels. At the intersection of the X, pour several ounces of various sticky, smelly, unidentifiable fluids. If the X falls anywhere convenient, make a field adjustment such that the X falls under the lowest-hanging piece of equipment on the underside of truck. Extra points for leaking transfer case or hot exhaust pipe.

Turn off work lights. Smear grease on lenses of safety glasses. Artificially raise body temperature either through stress, alcohol, or exercise.

In the event that you do not use alcohol, or are exercise-intolerant, you may shout "Honey, can you come here RIGHT NOW and help me find a part?" The resulting delay in response, (EX: 5 minutes) and useless suggestions ("Why don't you stop now, it's late, and I need to talk to you about the mortgage") upon arrival, will induce the correct amount of stress.

Remove any safety apparel that might protect your appendages from injury. This includes hats, gloves, kneepads, long pants, etc. Be sure that pocket rags, belts, shirt tails, etc, are positioned to catch on sharp parts of truck undercarriage.

The part you seek will be in the puddle, at the location of the X. Don't bump your head on the way out.

apb



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